Ask Aperture
by CaveStoryNinja
Summary: Ask anyone from Surviving Middle School at Aperture Science a question! Rules inside.
1. Rules and Guidelines

**Ask Aperture!**

**Hey everyone! Welcome to Ask Aperture!**

**All you have to do is submit a review asking ANYONE in my story, Surviving Middle School at Aperture Science, a question! If you ask someone like me (Gareth) a question, I will answer it personally. Otherwise, if you ask someone who is a real person, I will personally ask them a question. If you ask Chell (Adrienne), ATLAS (Adam), P-Body (Connor), Turret (Will) Wheatley (Me, Gareth) GLaDOS, Glados (Me, Emily) The Companion Cube (Mason), Midnight or Xelac (FeepTheNinja and Xelac) then expect what THEY SAID for an answer. Have fun!**

**Ask questions in reviews ONLY, please. No PMs.**

**Use this format:**

**[Insert Character Name Here]**

** [Your Question]**

**Nice and simple. Have fun!**

**By the way, expect some updates for my other stories soon. Not like TOMORROW-Soon, but soon compared to the time it took between posting them and now. Now, have fun, and PLEASE no swearing. If you swear, your question will not be answered.**

**Wheatley: That was my idea.**

**Whatever. Just go! Review! Ask a question! I'd love to answer it!**

**Oh, and if you want to ask more than one question (Same character or not) go ahead! I want as many questions as possible. I'll try to get to them all, although it may take a while at times. Don't get mad!**

**Sorry, one more thing…**

**Please don't leave any reviews of ANYTHING but asking questions. Ok, you should be fully educated now… Get asking!**


	2. GLaDOS is asked about cake

Hello! Ask Aperture received a few questions. Here are the answers, from the people themselves!

First up, M4GIC OR4NGES Asked:

_GLaDOS, have you ever considered some kind of psychological disorder? Paranoia? Schizophrenia?_

And she answered as follows:

_**No, I have never considered a 'psychological disorder'. Are you kidding me? I'm a Genetic Lifeform (and Disk Operating System)! And besides, if that were to happen to anyone, it'd probably be the moron or Turret. Paranoia? A small amount, maybe. Only when SHE decided 'No, I'm too amazing to be baked' and started escaping. I was a bit paranoid then. Schizophrenia? For a person whose avatar is a smiling orange, you sure know how to spell. NO, I have never experienced that. I highly doubt you have any idea what it even MEANS.**_

_**-GLaDOS**_

I just wanted to note that the smiling orange is an awesome avatar, so don't feel bad. Up next, The Legend of Derpy asked GLaDOS:

_If I baked you a cake, what would you do with it?_

I'm sure she had been waiting to answer that for quite a bit of time.

_**Cake? If you baked ME a cake? (Laughs) Well, to start, I would make sure [subject name here] knew. I would brag about it until she left Aperture for good. Then, after offering it to her and inviting her over on a specific date, I would wreck it as much as possible so that not a trace could ever be found. Then, I would tell her that she was too late and somebody ate it… Hey, that isn't a terrible idea…**_

_**-GLaDOS**_

Yep, that's about exactly what she would do. Anyway, we have one more question for today. Shaggysoawesome asked Wheatley:

_Are you ever going to stop killing yourself and just get over it?_

And he answered:

_**I'm over it! Really! I didn't kill myself anyway. Just burned. I can't be completely incinerated unless there's like razors at the end. Besides, I LIKE being dramatic. It's fun! Like, for instance, Chell gave me CAKE because I was so dramatic about it! Drama helps me live life! Uh… am I done? Wait, I'm writing this. Why am I just realizing this now? Uhhh… THE END!**_

_**-Wheatley**_

Well, that's all for now. Keep reviewing, and you will show up, as long as you follow the guidelines on chapter 1! Bye for now!

-BoomerangFlower123


	3. Wheatley is asked about space

**HELLO AGAIN!**

We got some new questions, AND the answers. First up, ASHPoD67 asked Chell:

_**Were you about to cry when you realized there was no cake?**_

And she answered:

**No, but I was a little mad. Well, no, not a little mad, more REALLY mad.**

**-Chell**

Next, portalfan4351 asked Wheatley:

_**Why did you go crazy when you died in Minecraft?**_

And he answered:

**Yeah, I went crazy because at that point, my memory was still gone, and I didn't know about video games and how if you die, you can just respawn. So I thought that it meant I was really dead. I feel really stupid about that now… it's hard to live it down.**

**-Wheatley**

Third, I Am Blueberry asked GLaDOS:

_**Why didn't you kill us for playing 'pin-the-tail-on-the-boss-lady'? Sure I thought it was fun, but I really thought you were going to kill us. And when did you get a Facebook?**_

And she answered:

**I was feeling sympathetic that day. Morality had gotten stuck in my mainframe, and, well… yeah.**

**Anyway, about the Facebook, that was a dare. Enough said.**

**-GLaDOS**

Then, I Am Blueberry asked Companion Cube:

_**Do you forgive Chell for dropping you in the incinerator? Or do you still hold a grudge?**_

And he answered:

**Yeah, I forgive her. Only because just now did she explain to me that it was to move on to the next test. Until then, my secret intention was to get her back… oh wait, did I just say that aloud?**

**-Companion Cube**

Almost done now. Plummerwithguitar asked Chell:

_**Why were you mute until you had to survive middle school?**_

And she answered:

**Well, I wasn't really mute, more just stubborn. I could talk, but… It was hard to decide whether or not I really should. After just quickly looking at this, you'd say 'I would talk, of course!' but try waking up to dead parents and Aperture. Ughh. You have no idea what I went through…**

**-Chell**

Then, Plummerwithguitar asked Space Core:

**_Have you ever thought of becoming an astronaut?_**

**__**And he answered:

**! Yes. Astronaut. Wanna be an astronaut. Remember. Space cops. When they come. Play it cool. Play it cool. Astronaut. Space. My dad is space. He is proud of me. Right dad? Yes son. He is proud because I wanna be a spacetronaut. Space. Space. Astronaut. Spacetronaut. SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!**

**-Space Core**

****Finally, Plummerwithguitar asked Wheatley:

**_How was it like, being in space?_**

**__**And he answered:

**I bet it would've been much better if I wasn't thinking about everything I did. It was a nice experience, or so I think. The yellow me seemed to love it. He was yelling, ! Over and over. He didn't shut up! I wish I could go back, just for a bit, to really experience it.**

**-Wheatley**

****Well, that's all for now. Bye for now. Remember; use reviews ONLY for asking questions, please! Thank you, and KEEP ASKING!


	4. Space Core quotes himself

Hey everyone! Sorry about me taking a while to update. So, anyway, let's go right in…

First, my friend turret asked:

_**Hey GLaDOS, why do you keep hugging Gareth?**_

And she answered:

**I do not need to distribute that information to you. It's…classified. I…uh… ok, I'm done now… may I be finished? Umm… goodbye.**

**-GLaDOS**

Up next, ASHPoD67 asked another question:

_**Did you believe Chell was going to forgive you when you apologized to her? For ALL you'd done?**_

And he answered:

**Look, can you DROP that? I didn't know WHAT she was going to say. I just wanted to see, OK? I KNOW what I did was wrong. I wouldn't do it again. But it was worth checking if she would.**

**-Wheatley**

Then, Your Favorite Freak asked the following 3 questions:

_**GLaDOS, What would happen if I decided to annoy you forever? And if you killed me, I'd haunt you.**_

_**Chell, what would you do if you were turned into an AI?**_

_**Wheatley, If you were to own a pet, what would it be?**_

And Wheatley answered first:

**I would have a MONGOOSE. They're so flippin' awesome… wait a second, can someone please explain what a Mongoose is?**

**-Wheatley**

Then, Chell answered:

**I don't wanna be turned into an AI. I'm perfectly happy with my normal human body. I have no idea what I'd even DO as an AI…**

**-Chell**

Finally, GLaDOS answered:

**You can't haunt a robot (as far as I know). So I WOULD kill you. So get comfy while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters…**

**-GLaDOS**

Up next, portalfan4351 asked:

_**Space Core, what would you do if Space wasn't real?**_

And he answered:

**!**

**(Translation: If Space wasn't real, my name wouldn't be Space Core. Earth Core, maybe?)**

Then, Assozat asked:

_**If you had to choose ONE of the following things as your favorite part of Space what would it be? Satellites, stars, the Sun, the planets, or the moon?**_

And he responded:

**My favorite part of space is SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!**

And that's all for today. Keep looking for updates soon!


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